“Although I was born into certain circumstances, and I couldn’t control the things around me, I could change my response to those situations. By changing my response, I could change my destiny.”
This quote spoke to me as I was reading an article on author Vex King. I can see the similarities in growing up, I learned very early not to let someone’s actions control my reaction.
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When you are dealing with trauma from when you were child or as an adult, it can have a huge impact on your personal, business, or romantic relationships. You get triggered by most of the world around when you relive negative experiences. These types of experiences can make you feel as if you want to give up on your dreams and purpose in life.
Mostly what I see today are people not acknowledging their trauma. We live in a society where it is easy to escape in various ways like drugs and alcohol or binge-watching Netflix series, so who wants to talk about the things that make them most vulnerable. Trauma can show up in a person in many ways in behavior and emotions, and when you neglect the parts of you that still needs to heal, you take away from getting to know who you could be.
The good news is when you are ready to take the first step in acknowledging your trauma, you can use it to transform your dreams into reality. When you take the necessary steps towards healing, you begin to understand how you are feeling, thinking, and doing. When you know who you are and what you want, you can overcome the limits trauma has set on you and turn your negative experiences into a positive fulfilling life. Recognizing how my trauma changed my behavior was the first step in my healing journey, and towards realizing the vision I had for myself.
Over the years my journey has led me to a few spaces that helped guide me into living my dreams. Here are two of the main tools I use to help me use trauma as a guide to achieve my dreams:
Seek professional help.
It is important to find a safe space to process your traumas. And a lot of the times talking to a friend might make it harder to be honest because of fear. Therapy provides tools to help manage your emotions, and helps you identify the root cause of your trauma.
2. Avoid becoming an island.
Isolating yourself is a common response to trauma. Staying connected with your loved ones is important when you are having a hard time. Having a healthy and safe support system can help increase self-esteem, resiliency, and give you a sense of belonging. Connecting with others can be a great tool for healing.
In conclusion, in order to transform your trauma to live your dream requires you to check in with yourself to identify what you need in order to achieve your dreams.